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I work in an office that sits off a long hall. I face the door. Lately there's been a lot of activity, with people from corporate that I don't usually get to see coming in and out. Their presence here has turned my normally empty doorway into a proscenium arch, framing scenes of corporate activity, inactivity, and pure ridiculousness.

I am new to the company, so most of these people don't know me—or only know me a little bit. One of the stories that plays out often in my doorway theatre is Get To Know You. On their way from one end of the hall to another, they pause, lean on the doorframe, and look me in the eye: Where'd you go to college? What are you working on? I hear you're new to DC? I take my hands off the keyboard (or out of the Cheezit box, as the case may be), and answer: Chapman University! Tech Writing! True! We nod, we smile, we find similarities, and they disengage to step back on the conveyor belt of the hallway.

Another popular installment in Doorway Theatre is the Non-Sequitur. As a new employee, I am relatively neutral territory. They assume that I don't have some sort of pre-conceived opinion about them; so Tom (names have been changed to protect the annoying) can bitch loudly about Sheila/Alyssa/Matt and knows I'll think he's in the right. Dan can comment on the smell of the office (it is weirdly unpleasant) and I'll think he's hilarious. Jill can shake her head at the antics of Tom and Dave and I'll share her the stuff I put up with! shrug. And I can sit behind my desk and judge, judge, judge.

My personal favorite Doorway Theatre show is the Nothing To See Here. That's where we don’t look at each other. I may close whatever offensive browser window is open and sit up straighter, he'll stop humming that song he started humming further down the hall – we won't look at each other. NO MATTER WHAT. Because we're too busy. There's Nothing To See Here.


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